Osabella Ciaravola
where can I get this skirt?
Why do some places immediately feel like home? After 4 years of hearing everything clearly pronounced the South Carolina accent all at once soothed my soul. It washed over me like the iodine smell of salt air. In Colorado there was no inflexion to make our sentences sound like home. Phrases going almost extinct in my own mouth as I lost the feeling of southern speech. To finally move back to the south was what I had been holding on to for so long. Hoping that maybe if we were both back on familiar ground things would be better.
The man was so wrong for me. But the little town was perfect. How funny that the things I miss now have nothing to do with him and everything to do with the location. The resin of pine sap, blue hydrangeas growing next to my front porch, running down to Harris Teeter to pick up things for yet another BBQ or dinner on the back patio where I had herbs growing in the window boxes on the railing. Its been over a year and when I think about that time in my life I don’t really picture him at all. Just the sweetness of our neighborhood, the girls that I met and still talk to, the columns on the library, the heat and sunshine and cotton that grew across the road.
This is happening in Apopka in February. Join the call to protect and restore Florida’s water. For more information visit floridaconservationcoalition.org.
We only talk when its safe. When theres miles between us. When I’m laying next to my boyfriend in bed. On rainy spring days or early mornings at the coffee shop on campus. The two misplaced southerners in our little western town. Friends from the first y’all over agave martinis at Elliots.
There was always some girl hanging around trying to catch your attention. And I was always been faithlessly in love with whichever cowboy I was seeing at the time.
And yet on rainy spring days we’d find ourself meeting up for a quick beer at the basement campus bar. Or going for long walks in City Park with the roommates dog, the fog making it seem like we were the only ones in town. Two blocks up and one block over to your house for burgers, bourbon and things that should have made me feel guilty but somehow never did. And it was always foggy and raining. It made us laugh because that just meant it was too warm to snow.
This is beautiful. You rarely see African-American ballerinas, especially ones my age. I would love for my future daughter to continue ballet past her childhood.
And I love how their tights and shoes match their skin tones!
SO CUTE.
A sparkly mint colored tank top with a lace back. Skinny jeans, nude heels, that new cream colored blazer that I spent way too much money on. Pick me up in the new BMW but put the top up because its too cold really for this outfit. Fall in Florida is rarely this chilly. We laughed about the weather and got a tour of the new construction on the house before swinging out to dinner at this mexican place that has the best margaritas. We’ve been there before. Its the first time we’ve gone somewhere twice in the five months or so that we’ve been hanging out.
I broke down and told you about my plans to go back to grad school. My funny little dream of getting my phd and teaching at some college. You talked to me all about the craziness with your ex wife and this new business deal that might turn into something good. We sipped on blackberry mint margaritas and you winked at me knowing that I can never turn down tequila.
Some nights like this just seem comfortable. Later on at your gorgeous home on the lake we laughed and tried to get the pilot light for the fire place on so we could be all cheesy and romantic.
We kissed for a little bit, sitting there on the rug in front of the cold fire place. Our foreheads together during a few long seconds that seemed like they could mean more to me than to you.
Later on when I was at home, putting together my list of things for the weekend, to do this and to call that person, I thought about things as they are. Not as they should be, or could be, or how you or I wanted them to be but the reality of how things actually were.
A virgo and a Libra/Virgo cusp. Funny how we sometimes think that it will work out. We read each other too well so we overcompensate by trying to hide things that don’t matter. Each of us knowing how the game is played and hoping that the other will call the bluff, tangling our communication lines to the point where even we get confused. I’m rapidly getting tired of it all.
